Plausible Excuses

"Blame Everyone Else" Movement

(It's so much fun - you should try it!)


1) I have inherited "Hoarding Genes"

2) With prolonged loss of civil liberties and vision issues, I have switched to automatic pilot 

You see the results and it is not my fault

For future reference -- At first there was only the cheap, sandpaper type available and that will reside in the guest bathroom

[Side Note: I am facing 2 more eye surgeries, beginning next week, so I will be on hiatus]

A Couple Things

To Be Absolutely Truthful...
My ancestors chose the wrong side during the revolutionary war & fled to Canada. However, they saw the error of their ways and migrated back to New York.

Updating The Bird Battle...
I finally found the solution to keep the winged creatures from feasting on my plants. However, they are retaliating by leaving excrement all over my patio chairs. The skirmish continues.

My Yearly Independence Day Share...
Please, please, this is not a political statement - Just a beautiful updated version I just found which I hope you enjoy.

“Let Us Live To Make Men Free”

Hummingbird Saga Continues

Waiting for those "fascinating little birds with their long beaks and fast-moving wings which can be seen darting round nectar feeders and flowers" to show up....

I notice my succulents, which have been bountifully reproducing, are under attack. With the dedication of Columbus, I discover small black birds have turned the hummingbird feeder into a private perch, and, they are responsible for my plant carnage. 

           

The War Is On
1) Apply Raid House & Garden, discover the enemy can't read, or chooses not to read the label
2) It acts as an attractant as all the bird relatives join and feast on
3) Time for a Google Search: "Natural Bird Repellents" 
4) Choose the Cayenne Pepper one & follow the directions to the best of my ability (with continued limited eye sight)
5) Discover in the dilution process .... well, let's just say I've found another use for face masks.
6) Sprayer doesn't seem to work. 
7) Analyzing the situation, discover spice not fully dissolved, spill the contents, inhale into my throat & lungs, begin spasmistic coughing to such an extent the neighborhood watch descends in a horde to mask shame me (I have vowed to not wear a mask in public)

War Continues
1) Finally get plants sprayed
2) Discover southern birds cut their teeth on spice, cayenne is considered just a condiment.
3) As a way of thanking me, they are emboldened. I can't scare them off by knocking on the window. I have to get an umbrella and bravely shoo them away
4) This just makes them laugh at their inferior hominids

Secret Weapon
1) I am from Revolutionary and Pioneer stock
2) We "Never Surrender, Never Give Up"
3) Google search here I come

Stay Tuned For Future Updates & May You Have Adventures Of Your Own!